Anna Semak: “Some Zenit fans started cursing me”

Orlov

— After Sergei was appointed head coach of Ufa, some media wrote that Gennady Orlov proposed his candidacy to the management. The people of Ufa could not reach your husband for a long time, thinking that another team had intercepted him. But in fact, at that moment you were in the theater with him. Remember that day, and is it all true?

— It will be easy to answer, because the last time Sergei and I went to the theater was six years ago, so it’s not true. Gennady Sergeevich proposed Sergei's candidacy? Yes it's true. He called the management and recommended Sergei for the role of head coach. My first trip to Ufa coincided with the moment when Gennady Sergeevich was also here. We had dinner in the same company, and that’s when I met him. Made a strong impression. A true Petersburger, very charming. Our family is grateful to him for helping Sergei take such a step in his career.

— There have been 18 moves in your life. The last one, in Ufa, is the largest and heaviest?

Sergey Semak / Photo: © Vasily Ponomarev / Edgar Breshchanov / Sportbox.ru

— Over time, you begin to “overgrow” with things, this is inevitable when you have so many children and a fairly well-functioning life. What was more difficult was not even moving to Ufa itself, but moving from an apartment outside the city. There was uncertainty about walking children and walking dogs. Therefore, changing from an apartment to a house was very difficult; we had a million boxes.

— How did you react to the fact that you had to move to Ufa? Was there joy for your husband or anticipation of problems?

- In such cases it all depends on the character. I am very easy-going and always enjoy any changes in life. Difficulties come later. At first there was confusion. I started looking on the map where Ufa is located and what interesting and useful things there are in this city. A little later, when I arrived here, I realized that I would have to face great difficulties. First of all, household ones. In St. Petersburg, everything was fine-tuned down to the smallest detail, including logistics. Having moved to another city, you start everything from scratch. The adaptation was difficult.

— Do you have any doubts that you did this in vain?

- Without any doubts. I am the wife of a football player, I support Sergei with all my heart and I understand that the feeling that crowded stands give cannot be replaced by anything. He greatly missed these emotions after his professional career ended. When he found himself on the bench as a coach, his eyes lit up. A new and bright professional life began. For this it was worth leaving everything and moving.

— So when your husband was an assistant head coach, he still lacked a certain drive?

- Certainly. You know, it's hard to explain. When you are in the game all the time, and then you find yourself on the other side of the field and placing chips for your comrades with whom you recently played on the same team, this is a very difficult psychological moment, not everyone can withstand it.

Friends

— What was Sergei like at that time? How did he change?

“Anyone who has gone through the end of their playing career will understand what I’m talking about. It is impossible to maintain the same vitality when you are standing on the threshold of the unknown. I understand all the responsibility of Sergei. We have a large family, first of all he thinks about how to feed and support everyone. And it was a moment of very exciting reflection. Will you be able to become a coach? What if it's not his? My task was to support and make it clear that he could do it.

— Did your husband consult with you about moving or did he just voice the decision he made?

Photo: © Personal archive of the Semak family

- Of course, I consulted. And I put my ambitions aside, because I understood: now or never. I understood: you need to travel to “garrisons” in order to be the wife of a good coach. At the family council, we decided that we could not refuse such an offer. In the end, I'm glad it all happened this way.

— The following option was discussed: you and your family will remain in St. Petersburg, and Sergei will train in Ufa and visit his family?

— I thought about such a scenario, but only for a second. I don’t like the idea of ​​a “guest” marriage at all. Firstly, all responsibility for the family falls on me. Secondly, children would grow up without a father. With Sergei’s schedule, it would be very difficult to come to St. Petersburg. And endlessly taking seven children to Ufa to meet their father is even more problematic. Gathering seven people and going somewhere is a whole event. Besides, Seryozha and I are close friends. If we were just partners in raising children, then we probably would have decided to do what was simpler. When you raise children in one city, and your husband is in another, without care, without your support and alone, this is wrong.

— Sergei himself also did not consider this option?

— I didn’t consider it. Moreover, he didn’t even think about it.

— What were the first days in Ufa like?

— At first we lived in a hotel, in a two-level apartment. I was the first to come to investigate. Then she brought one child, a second, a third... Soon we were sitting on each other’s heads, sleeping like soldiers, 2-3 people on one bed. It was very difficult to find an apartment of such a design that we could comfortably accommodate our entire group. (Six children and two adults; Anna’s eldest daughter and Sergei’s eldest son - both from their first marriages - are already studying in higher educational institutions and living separately. - Match TV

). One day I reached the boiling point, looking at the same hotel apartments and houses for daily rent. It began to seem that we would live in a hotel for the entire 2-3 years of the contract. Later, however, an apartment was found - but without a dishwasher, although in a large family this is a necessary thing. Just imagine: if everyone just drinks water, it will take about twenty minutes to wash the glasses.

Personal life

At the moment, Sergei is in his second marriage. He met his first wife at the age of 18. In 1955 they got married and immediately after the wedding their son Ilya was born.

After 10 years of marriage, Sergei and Svetlana separated, but they managed to maintain friendly relations. Sergei still financially supports Svetlana and his son to this day.

Semak met his second wife in a St. Petersburg restaurant, where his future wife worked as an administrator. They started dating. Sergei was still married to Svetlana at that time, but difficulties had already begun in their relationship.

His wife Anna talked about how they met. She was embarrassed by the engagement ring on Sergei’s finger, but she could not reject him, as he immediately began to beautifully and persistently court her. So they started dating and a love triangle developed that lasted 3 years. It was a difficult time for all three.

At the moment, Sergei and Anna have been happily married for 17 years. Their family has 8 children:

1. Ilya - from Sergei’s first marriage;
2. Semyon;
3. Ivan;
4. Maya is Anna’s daughter from her first marriage;
5. Varvara;
6. Savva;
7. Illaria;
8. Tanya is an adopted daughter.

It was Anna's initiative to take the child from the orphanage. She always wanted to give someone a new life. Sergei was worried for a long time about what they would be able to give to this child, because Tanya has caudal regression syndrome or mermaid syndrome.

Sergei spends most of his time at work. When he is at home, he devotes himself entirely to the children. He is always in touch with his family, communicates on Skype, and calls on the phone. Anna describes him as a unique father. For him, family means children. Sergei puts them first, and his wife is a pleasant additional option.

The Semak family lives according to special traditions. Every evening they gather for family dinner and ask each other for forgiveness. The tradition of going to bed with a clear conscience has been established for a long time. At night, Sergei and his wife drink tea with special antique glass holders.

The couple has a high relationship. Sergei and Anna Semak are going to write a book together dedicated to Sergei’s merits. Anna grew up in the family of a priest, and she has different ideas about marriage, about the role of a wife in the life of her beloved man.

Mat

Photo: © Personal archive of the Semak family

— How did the children react to the move?

- Children are children. "Hooray! We're moving!” It didn’t even matter where, they were pleased with the very thought of change.

- Did no one really say: “I have friends, school, teachers here, how can I leave all this”?

- It happened like that. We were bored and eager to go back. In St. Petersburg they studied at a private school, in a closed small group. Having moved to Ufa, for the first time in my life I found myself in a public school where there were 40 people in a class. For some it turned out to be science and a positive experience. For example, the eldest son Semyon quickly gained authority in the class. New friends appeared, everything turned out well. With the younger ones it’s the opposite. It was very difficult for them to adapt to the new difficult environment. Children are completely different gathered in the classroom, someone is already swearing. In St. Petersburg they studied at an Orthodox school and did not even know that such words existed in the world.

— When children came home from school and shared new words, what did you answer them?

“One way or another, this is a positive experience for all of us.” Previously we lived in a vacuum, now we are faced with real life. In St. Petersburg, children did their homework at school, in Ufa they began to bring them home. Nothing in life comes easy. I think it was in Ufa that I became a real mother. I began to get to know my children more deeply and at some point I realized how much had been missed before. When I left everything to teachers and nannies, and tried to organize a business or just find myself. Now I have come to the conclusion: my main “business” is my family.

— Sergei does homework with the children? Or did you protect him from all this?

Photo: © Personal archive of the Semak family

“I didn’t protect him from anything.” Moreover, it brings him great pleasure. He is much smarter, an excellent student in everything. When I need to solve some school problem, I write to him: “Seryoga, help me out, I don’t understand anything.” And he only needs a minute and a half to send the solution and answer. It happens in life, when an excellent student gets along with a C student - this is our option (smiles).

— At first, in Ufa, Sergei drove a modest Korean hatchback with a manual transmission. A little later, I drove your minibus from St. Petersburg. Is it true that there were a couple of cases when you fit the whole family into that hatchback?

— Yes, and when the children got out of the car one after another, it looked funny from the outside. Somehow they packed it compactly and compacted it (laughs). Although we tried to walk to school. Then the club gave us a crossover. I was very happy: although not by much, the club car turned out to be more spacious. And the brand never played a role. Sergei doesn’t care what to drive, he’s not proud and isn’t obsessed with luxury.

— Is it possible to fit 6 children in the back seat?

- This is an isolated case. Most often we divide them into groups. When we go somewhere, we choose different combinations, because some children are incompatible with each other.

Previously, she and Semak often quarreled, but now they have learned to be friends

We started with the main thing - parting and a new meeting with Semak:

“We went through a difficult period, but we reset the counters and, like in a computer game, moved to a new level. Previously, I was “married”: I dissolved so much that I lost myself. We took root in each other, and I could no longer imagine who I was on my own.

When I learned to live without Sergei, having overcome depression, I felt my strength, a sea of ​​energy was freed up: I started singing, playing the guitar, opened a restaurant in Bali, and became a co-owner of a clothing brand.

With the new “meeting,” we rebuilt the boundaries of the relationship: I gained autonomy, the opportunity to do the work I love, we respect each other’s choices and free will, we learned to be friends, and stopped quarreling.

Trust and intimacy have become our main guides. I am Serezha’s connection with the cosmos, he is mine with the earth. Sergei graduated from school with a gold medal, remained an excellent student throughout life: rational, wearing trousers with ironed creases, living in a “correct” rectangular matrix. Looking at me, with neat, cautious steps he tries out a different life, and he likes it.

I am still running the vegan restaurant Secret Spot in Bali, and in the future I plan to open a similar restaurant in St. Petersburg. For the first time, we wanted to do something together, not counting everyday and family issues.

But it is family, thoughts about the future of our children that give me the most powerful energy charge. The greatest pleasure from everything I do now is that I no longer face the question of “who will I be when I grow up.”

Compatibility

Photo: © Personal archive of the Semak family

— Sergei told me that in your family the children are divided according to their interests. What kind of groups are they and how did this happen?

— I would even say, not by interests, but by temperament. There are “roosters” who are prone to fights and quarrels. There are contemplative children, and there are neutral ones who are compatible with any group. I try not to form a group where there are two “roosters”, because I will constantly separate them. And before big trips, for example on vacation, I often think about possible options. If you take two, you might even be able to relax. I can take four, there is such a combination. But it’s worth imagining that the rest will be left alone... Some will be given the wrong pills, others will read the fairy tale in the wrong way, the third will simply be sad. And then I understand that we need to take everyone. It is very difficult, but I have already adapted. Therefore, a holiday trip with four is a SPA resort for me.

— On your Instagram, you wrote that with two children it was much harder for you than with five. How can this be? And did you and Sergei plan that you would have such a large family?

“When Sergei and I started dating, he immediately told me: “I want you to give me one more child than my mother had.” And they had five children in their family. And then I was still surprised. Six children? It's unlikely that I'm capable of this. But it stuck in my head and at some point it worked.

After three children, I was in a state of stable stress. Pregnancy gave me a feeling of harmony and peace, I wanted to return to this state. Therefore, when I was not pregnant, I stopped feeling comfortable. As if something was missing. And when the doctor advised me to stop, I won’t say that I was happy. The first few years were difficult without this condition, apparently I just liked it. And if it weren’t for my health, I think the family’s growth would have continued further.

— Sergei has a specific job. How much time does he manage to devote to his children? What does he do on his free days, if he has any at all?

Photo: © Personal archive of the Semak family

— When he has a day off, Sergei devotes it entirely to his children. They are really looking forward to this day. Sergei understands that he doesn’t give them much due to his busy schedule and does his best: does homework, always takes them to the skating rink, the cinema or the pool. He tries to fit everything he can into a small day off.

- How often do days like this happen?

- Very, very rare. A full day off - about once every two weeks.

- Does he pay attention to you on this day or only to the children?

Photo: © Personal archive of the Semak family

— The schedule is crazy now, and I don’t demand much from him. But we have our own scheme. A certain period of time passes, after which we simply go somewhere together, in order to completely isolate ourselves from everyday problems and switch gears. Two or three days is enough. As a rule, we go to Europe. We really like Venice. On vacation we just walk, talk, communicate, and fill ourselves with each other. And for some time this is enough.

— You said that Sergei has a day off once every two weeks. It turns out that raising six children falls entirely on your shoulders. Isn't it too hard?

“Sometimes I look at myself from the outside, and it seems to me that this is not me, that this is impossible. But this is a momentary weakness. The hardest thing is to distribute schedules: who has what section, who goes to the doctor, who goes somewhere else. It is very important to competently deal with logistics. We have a person who transports children. I used to drive myself, but now I don’t, unfortunately. I am very absent-minded, and driving is a big responsibility.

Raising six is ​​difficult, but you get used to everything. It's also very difficult when they fight. Boys grow up, they develop ambitions, which can sometimes escalate into a quarrel or fight. Psychologically it is very exhausting, sometimes I reach the highest boiling point. And then my family lets me go to St. Petersburg for two or three days to recharge emotionally. Our home is there, and sometimes things accumulate that need to be resolved.

From time to time, hellish fatigue sets in. But I have my own little rituals. For example, in the evening, when I put everyone to bed, I go to the bathroom, light candles, pick up a book, and in half an hour I manage to just come to my senses, sort out my thoughts, and calm down.

Anna Semak is the wife of Zenit coach Sergei Semak, mother of seven children, including an adopted girl Tanya, blogger, writer, restaurateur and philanthropist. In winter, Anna released a collaboration with the St. Petersburg brand Arny Praht: 30% of the cost of the spacious Mutter shopping bag created by Anna will go to the “Take a Step” fund, which helps children with Spina Bifida syndrome - this is exactly the disease her adopted daughter has. This collaboration became the reason for a big conversation with Anna - about smart help, books, family and adopted children, popularity on Instagram and finding resources.

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About charity

When I was eight years old, my friend Katka Ganina and I decided to save the world and began to look for a victim to whom we could “do good.” We went into a grocery store near the house and saw a poor old woman. We liked this archetype, we forcibly escorted her home and decided to take patronage over her. We began to distribute responsibilities: mine included washing her clothes, my friend got the more pleasant part - cooking, and she loved to cook. My grandmother was already quite old and suffered from incontinence, and this was my first lesson in humility, since the linen was not the freshest. But I didn’t pass the test; it only lasted me three days. We decided to find some simpler victim - small abandoned kittens and freezing adult cats, puppies, dogs.

In general, we saved someone all the time, it became a direct need - to do good deeds so that the lives of other people and animals would become better and brighter.

Thank God, over time the opportunity to help financially appeared. You know, the Gospel says that you should always give tithes. I remember this impression was made on me when I came to confession and the priest told me: “You must always give your tithe.” And he cited a case as an example. A woman turned to him: “Father, help, pray! We use brooms, complete ruin. Business is not going well." He told her: “And you wear tithes.” She: “What about tithes? We’re basically broke!” He: “No, give tithe.” Six months later he comes to him again and says: “Father, we have blossomed!” I always remember this gospel rule and try, whenever possible, to hear other people’s pain and pay attention to other people’s needs.

About the “Take a Step” Foundation

The Take a Step Foundation was founded in April 2020. The goal of the foundation is to provide assistance to families with children diagnosed with Spina bifida to avoid secondary complications in children and integrate them into an active social life. The foundation supports families with children with spina bifida living throughout the Russian Federation.

About requests for help

People write to me a lot asking for help, but now there are a huge number of scammers - I have already learned to recognize them, but in the hustle and bustle, sometimes you can fall into a trap. For example, an old football player friend recently wrote to my husband on WhatsApp asking him to urgently transfer money to his father for cancer treatment. Sergei read it, saw a friend’s photo in the messenger and immediately transferred a huge amount, without checking anything. The number was immediately blocked.

I don’t ask Sergei about everything he does, but I believe that he gives away not even a tithe, but probably eighty percent of what he earns to those in need. This is an incredibly merciful person. I have often witnessed people calling him asking for money for an urgent operation, and without hesitation he transfers it. He is one of those people who would take off his last shirt, his last shoes and give it to someone in need.

When we go to church, I always give the children coins and ask them to give to the poor. This is a wonderful practice. The child understands from an early age that they need to give and help those in need.

We have taken on a certain number of commitments and are trying not to recruit more so as not to disappoint anyone. We have a ward named Makar, who fell from the Rostral Column. He is now being treated at the Guttmann Institute, a well-known neurorehabilitation center in Spain. (Nineteen-year-old photographer Makar Pretro fell from the Rostral Column while photographing the fireworks, spent forty-three days in intensive care, and is now undergoing a rehabilitation course. - Ed.

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I help the “Kind Kindred Club” through Irena Ponaroshka, my friend, she organizes charity fundraisers on Saturdays. We have a vegan restaurant called Grün, which operates according to Zero Waste principles and feeds the homeless. Well, the little things are nice.

If I see that a person’s request is naive, childish, and it’s easy for me to fulfill it... Today a woman wrote on Instagram: “I want to give my daughter a LOL doll, I have no money.” When I have the opportunity to please people, it gives me great joy.

I think that people's involvement in charity directly depends on their financial status. In cities where people are struggling to survive, charity can only be spiritual. But sometimes it also happens that a person gives his last hundred rubles - for God this is much more than a hundred thousand from a rich man, who will later remind everyone how great he is.

“Everything is possible in life. You just need to extend your hand”: Inna Inyushkina about help and Spina bifida

Should we say that you do charity work? Complex issue. On the one hand, they say: “Do good and run” - and I agree with this. At the same time, it seems to me that this topic needs to be covered—maybe not in detail, but in general terms. There is intrusive charity, when you are forced to donate money, and there is charity based on empathy, when you are told that someone is feeling bad, and you sincerely want to help. I think it’s easier for people to get involved in charity out of a sense of empathy.

About collaboration with Arny Praht

I don’t like all these stories with visualizations, marathons of desires, but in a strange way sometimes they work. When I think of something, it will definitely come true, I just have to say it out loud. She said, for example: “I want a boy, Savva.” Once - and he appeared. “I want Ilaria, a little girl” - and here she is, standing next to her. It was the same with this bag: I went to New Holland, saw Arny Praht clothes there and fell in love - wow, a vegan brand, made in St. Petersburg! I then told my friend: “Someday I will do a collaboration with them!” - and a month later they wrote to me with this proposal. We met, and everything came together - we were on the same page, there were no disputes, everything was done in literally three meetings.

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“What kind of bag do I need?” - I thought and realized: so that it could fit two dogs, a child, baby socks, diapers... This is how the Mutter model turned out - very roomy, very environmentally friendly. This is important - when I talk about it, I always add that it completely dissolves in water in two weeks. No one will check anyway - who would want to lose their bag?! But it sounds convincing.

Thirty percent of the cost of each bag goes to the Take a Step charity, which helps children with Spina Bifida. So every time I see someone with my bag, I will think: “Ah! How amazing! And what good taste the man has!”

About Spina Bifida

The decision to collaborate with the Take a Step foundation was spontaneous - when I was offered to do a collaboration with Arny Praht, I immediately decided that I would give my part of the funds to children, and reasoned that since my daughter has Spina Bifida, I would help the same children.

Just recently I said that a famous professor in Germany is ready to operate on Tanya and, perhaps, she will be able to walk. Alas, these were my illusions. The doctor at the orphanage warned me that she would never be able to go, this was impossible, because there was nothing to attach any structure to. The only thing we can do is to carry out episodic rehabilitation and monitor the kidneys. All. There is no chance to somehow correct the situation. Another problem is that, as Tanya grows up, she experiences discomfort due to the fact that there is very little space for the internal organs - they shrink and pain occurs. She can wake up in the middle of the night screaming wildly, and there is nothing you can do to help her except painkillers. Of course, this upsets us very much: if your child cries, it always hurts.

When I decided to take Tanya, I had no fears. The doctors at the orphanage said that she had urinary and fecal incontinence, but I just thought that this was a very inconvenient situation in everyday life - for example, when you fly on an airplane. It’s okay now, while she’s little, but what will happen next when she grows up? Remembering this story, I understand that at that moment the Lord closed my eyes to reality - I was not aware of the real problems awaiting me. But when Tanya was already at home, she told me: “Mom, you were deceived that I have incontinence. I feel great and do everything myself.” This was such a great joy for me!

Psychologically, Tanya had a difficult adaptation to the family, but this is an inevitable process in adoption. Everything is fine now.

About the expedition to Africa

In December, I was in Africa with a charity event - we were filming a documentary about albino children. This is an absolutely fantastic and at the same time terrifying story about discrimination against people of the Negroid race in their own country, on their own continent. In Africa, there is a belief that the meat of albino children is sacred, and by eating it you can be cured of many diseases. Therefore, albino children were first stolen and killed, and then, when the punishment was toughened and the death penalty was introduced for cannibals, they became more selective, more careful and began to cut off the arms and legs of these children. This is a scary story that I would like to cover.

We were there with Mila Anufrieva, she is a very famous philanthropist. She lives in Paris, came to Guinea-Bissau five years ago, fell in love with the country and began helping these children, and in particular the orphanage, which houses more than two hundred orphans.

I would like to take another child into the family, and a dark-skinned one, but I don’t know how everything will work out. For me, adopting a baby is like meeting your love.

For me, situations where they give you what they have are unacceptable. I have to see, smell, fall in love, understand that this is my child. And I do not exclude the possibility that everything will not happen this time - maybe later, but I want to see and feel everything, because I have a very good intuition.

As a child, I once went with my parents to visit their friends - it was a creative musical family: my mother was an opera singer, three children, and one of them was a boy from an orphanage, a black child. By the way, he later became a very famous dancer, his name is Roma Romanov. (Roman Romanov participated in the television projects “Star Factory”, “Star of the Dance Floor”, “Golden Gramophone”, “Song of the Year”, “New Wave”, “Main Stage”, “Five Stars”, starred in the videos “Hands Up!”, Jasmine, Timur Rodriguez and the films “Shadowboxing - 2”, “New Earth”, “First Love.” - Ed.

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His foster mother came to the orphanage, saw this boy and couldn’t pass by, so she took him home. Then I thought: what amazing people! In the 1980s, deciding to take a black child to Tver was truly a feat.

“Adaptation of an adopted child in a family is a continuous process”: what happens when the child ends up at home

Why do I want to adopt a black child? Firstly, since childhood I had a feeling that this was going to happen, and my intuition never let me down. Secondly, I am against racism, now I’m even writing a children’s book on this topic. I have always sincerely wondered why people can divide people by skin color, why they can insult a dark-skinned person, why they can allow themselves to laugh at him. I was horrified to discover that now, in the 21st century, racism is rampant - at every step you can meet a mother with a child who will point a finger at a dark-skinned person and shout some offensive things out of ignorance, because his parents simply did not tell him about the fact that there are other people. Black people in our country often become socially disabled because they constantly endure ridicule and discrimination. Therefore, taking such a child for me would be a step with a deep social message - I would like to show by example of our family that all people are brothers, all people are equal. Besides, I think it’s great to give a chance to a person who didn’t have a chance at all.

They often say: you need to help your own people. But I believe that geographical boundaries are very, very arbitrary, and the planet is like a placenta, it nourishes us all equally, without dividing us by religion or skin color, so I would like to help not only our own, since we already help our own, but also to those who are struggling to survive.

How does the family feel about this decision? Sergey, knowing about my amazing intuition, simply trusts me. He believes that everything I do, I do right. It is so valuable when a man believes in you so much. The children were very supportive! They are already thinking about what they will make their brother (for some reason they want it to be a brother): a rapper, a football player, a basketball player, a great dancer, and a chief astronaut.

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About books

My first book, Intimacy, an autobiographical book, came out in the fall. There was a strange story with her. Usually, when I write lyrics, I edit them very meticulously. And then I wrote part of it, sent it to the editor, and I didn’t want to re-read anything, because it would be very painful. But I am an open person, this is my nature, so it was not difficult for me to be frank; it was even useful to remember many episodes. I thought that if my example was edifying for someone, then the work done was not in vain.

I come from a very religious family, and in the book my transformation is clearly visible: as a child, a teenager from a patriarchal family, finds himself in an open, free environment and sees all the temptations of this world. Unfortunately, it often happens that children from religious families rebel and try to go against the system. I never stopped believing in God, I just put this topic aside because during my turbulent youth, many church rules did not fit in with my lifestyle at all. I needed to go through this path to get back to my real self. When people ask me how to find myself, I always answer that you can only find money in a winter jacket, and you need to return to yourself, because once we were real - when we didn’t need any material goods, when we were content with simple food , elementary things. I am very glad that at some point I returned to my old self. My Instagram is called “Secret Garden” (Anna’s account is @annas_secret_garden, it has 811 thousand subscribers. - Ed.)

, because I grew up in the garden, my sister and I spent a lot of time there, and I didn’t go to kindergarten. And when I wrote the first part of the book, I kept returning in my memories to my little self, to the state where I was as comfortable as possible. At some point this connection happened, and a lot in my life changed. I have come to understand what I really need and what is valuable to me. Then I decided that if I have the opportunity to broadcast something to people, it should only be something very useful. I don’t want to waste my or anyone else’s time on idle articles and cosmetics reviews. I want to help and will do for the rest of my life only what benefits people.

Soon I will have a series of six children's books published by Eksmo Publishing House. Everything with a social message, these are mirror books. A child will read his own story there, and an adult will see a completely different one. Like Exupery’s “The Little Prince”: you can’t say that this is a book for children, but they love it very much, and with age they understand some things more deeply.

The first book, Plowing, will appear by February. It is about childhood loneliness, about parents who give birth to children only because the time has come, and disappear all day at work, while the child grows up in the closet and does not fully identify any of the people around him, except his mother. He sees only women's legs, he lives in a forest of women's legs. Some are strong and hairy, like baobabs, while others are long and thin, like birches. With his bear cub Theodore, he fights in this forest with the nanny’s fiery dragons, trying to earn his mother’s love, her attention. This is a deep story about how children need quality communication with their parents.

Recently I was offered to publish a book about Sergei. At first I was scared, then I decided that it would be a novel in letters, and now I think that I will write a children's book. I don’t want to expose myself too much, to show the full depth of our relationship - something personal should still remain behind the scenes. And this way I can show children an edifying, wonderful example of how you can be a successful person and at the same time incredibly merciful, sympathetic, modest, and hardworking. It seems to me that Sergei’s story will help many guys believe in themselves.

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About Instagram

My main job is not visible on Instagram - every day I receive thousands of letters from desperate women, and they all ask for advice. I somehow intuitively select messages that touch me and help - not with advice, no, I ask the woman a question in such a way that she says out loud what she feels, and thus lead her to what she wants. I often correspond with women who are deeply depressed - this is really useful and necessary.

I didn’t count how much time I spend on Instagram, but now I’m trying to reduce it - I have a huge amount of work, my day is planned out by the minute. I get up early and start writing because I have very strict deadlines for books, and if I miss one day, I'm behind schedule, and then it's very difficult to get back on track. Then I go to work at my restaurant (Grün, the second restaurant - Anna's Secret Garden - will open in St. Petersburg in May 2020 - Ed.), I hold some meetings there, and in the evening my husband picks me up from the restaurant, we are together We go home at six o’clock, when all the children gather. I hold all my meetings and planning meetings at home, when the children fall asleep, at about nine o’clock - the guys come to me, and we sometimes sit until midnight, solving work issues. Naturally, in such a rhythm it is difficult to find time for Instagram, but since this is still my work platform, I try to post stories and sometimes posts.

The meaning of giving: the best charity cards for all occasions

On my page, I only block viral comments that can force a person who did not want to do anything bad that day to like a nasty statement - this hate, like a zombie virus, spreads very quickly. Someone wrote nasty things to you - and suddenly thirteen people stuck together. They, perhaps, did not want to take sin on their souls, but they were tempted. Sometimes I don’t delete it when I see that a person is simply not himself, but I don’t consider it necessary to talk to him, to allow him to penetrate into my world.

As a rule, people broadcast everything not about you, but about themselves. They react only to what concerns them personally, so as a person who understands psychology, I understand that everything that they write to me is not about me, but about those people who allow themselves to treacherously violate boundaries.

Superman is tired: Lyudmila Petranovskaya about emotional burnout

About the resource

My children give me energy. When I come home at zero, I start communicating with them and fill up like a battery. They then take this energy away from me, it’s such an endless process. But sometimes I need my own personal space, and it’s important to set aside time for this in order to recharge well.

Recently, Sergei and I got married again - the ceremony took place in Italy, on Lake Como. This was important not so much for us as for our children, because during the period when my husband and I had a crisis, they suffered very much, and we wanted to bring them joy and create a fairy tale for them. The children always asked: “How did you get married? How was it?” And when we made this decision, the children were so excited that they could be a part of this event!

Grandfather

Photo: © Personal archive of the Semak family

— How do you and Sergei explain to children that fighting is bad?

— I emphasize how important it is to love brothers and sisters. In the future, the family will become their life support. “Mom and dad will leave someday, and you will remain with each other.” In childhood, it is very important to establish the following pattern of relationships: the people in the family are the most dear and close, they need to be understood and loved. Making sure they understand this is my primary task as a mother.

— What was your childhood like? How did your parents raise you?

— I grew up in a strict patriarchal family. The head was grandfather, a military man. He tested the first atomic bomb near Semipalatinsk, and was the first person in the world to take measurements of the crater immediately after the explosion. The grandfather made all the decisions in the family. Next in rank was the father. He always respected his grandfather immensely and listened to his words. There was a clear hierarchy in the family. It was unacceptable for us to call our parents “you,” not to mention being rude to our elders.

We grew up in a church town, there were priests and deacons all around. Accordingly, our environment consisted of children of clergy. My best friend Sasha became the priest who saved several dozen people on the night of the flood in Krymsk. (Alexander Karpets, awarded the Vladimir Vysotsky Prize; according to eyewitnesses, Father Alexander managed to save more than 50 people. - Match TV

).

— In one of his interviews, Sergei said that he was “raised by the light pouring from his father’s office.” Bearing in mind that his parents set an example for him with their hard work. Does he raise his children the same way?

— When raising children, he is guided primarily by intuition. He gives them what he considers necessary, talks to them a lot, gives examples from life. In raising boys, he emphasizes masculinity and patriotism; he does this very naturally, because he himself lives and behaves this way. How to instill in a child not to swear if you swear yourself? Or how to tell your son “don’t drink vodka” if the child regularly sees his drunken father? Sergei himself serves as an example of moral education for children.

— Your husband introduced fines for obscene language in Ufa. Is there anything in common between leading a team and raising children?

- I think there is. He also tries to educate his team by personal example. The news caused a mixed reaction in the football community, many immediately began to joke about this topic. I think in our time we underestimate the power of words. Mat does not contribute to victory or the microclimate in the team. These words do not carry anything good.

Robinson

Photo: © Personal archive of the Semak family

— How does Sergei maintain contact with his family when he is on the road? For example, at training camps.

— We haven’t mastered various means of communication like Skype very well. The only thing I can do is call him and turn on speakerphone so that Sergei will say something to the children before bed. But parenting over the phone is wrong. Yes, we don’t have that. The most I can ask is to talk to my eldest son when something out of the ordinary happens.

It's hard when he's away. I’m like Robinson Crusoe, who counts the days and sometimes hours on the island until the end of packing. In a normal schedule, Sergei manages to communicate with children much more productively. We agreed with him that when he comes home from work in the evening, he devotes this small piece of time entirely to his family. I ask him to leave all the work, planning, and phone conversations behind the door.

— The work of a coach is also a psychological burden. Since Sergei ended his playing career, has he become different emotionally?

— They say correctly: the team wins, the coach loses. The work of a coach cannot be compared with the work of a football player. The player arrived, trained and left. He is free the entire afternoon and doesn’t think about anything. The coach arrives to work earlier than the rest, and returns home when everyone has already gone to bed. Unfortunately, it is impossible to completely isolate yourself from what happens at work. Losses happen to any team. At such moments, it is very important to be a strong person, put up some protection, not get upset and move on.

— Did Sergei succeed right away?

- Not right away. I saw how he reacted to game episodes, and it became scary. At some point I talked to him. She said that you shouldn’t devastate yourself so much, otherwise at a certain point you can simply burn out, and this will affect your health. But if you work as a head coach, you won’t be able to completely suppress emotional stress.

— Not so long ago, in the spring of 2020, you took a child with disabilities, a girl, from an orphanage. A very bold and responsible step. How did you and Sergei come to this, how did you decide to do this?

- The idea was mine. The plan had been hatched since childhood after one incident. In my presence, a neighbor’s girl was taken to an orphanage. You know, when a person is in trouble, lending a helping hand seems completely natural to me. The situation was very difficult. That girl’s mother committed suicide, and her father was sent to prison. I wanted us to take this girl and accept her as our own. But mother said: “Oranges will not be born from aspen trees.” In the sense that the girl had bad genetics. A stamp was put on a person who is not to blame for anything in his life. This was a huge shock for me. And at that moment I made a promise to myself: when I grow up, I will take a child from the orphanage.

I started thinking about adoption in detail right around the time Tanya was born. It turns out that I’ve been working toward this for ten years. Sooner or later we had to meet. I believe that it was fate.

“I am Serezha’s connection with space.” Oddities of Semak's wife

#ProstoProSport about the most unusual wife in Russian football. She wants to adopt a black child and compares herself to Dostoevsky.

Anna is the second wife of Zenit head coach Sergei Semak. At the same time, the only champion of Russia with three different teams is already her third husband. The couple has eight children. Five in common, a son, Sergei Bogdanovich, and a daughter, Anna, from her first marriages, as well as an adopted girl with a disability. The mentor of St. Petersburg is no stranger to this. He himself grew up surrounded by four brothers. But his wife is this little one. It seems that she decided to follow the example of Hollywood stars and adopt a black child, as she herself stated in a recent interview.

The reaction to Semak's words was mixed. Someone praised and supported, someone was surprised, but most of the comments boiled down to one thing - Anna is crazy. This is what she herself answered: “Dostoyevsky, Gogol, Tolstoy, Gorky, Yesenin, Hemingway, Charles Dickens, Hans Christian Andersen, Goethe, Moliere, Michelangelo, Beethoven, Schubert, Rachmaninov, Paganini, Lobachevsky, Tesla were considered crazy during their lifetimes.” , Isaac Newton, Pythagoras and many others. In no way do I put myself on a par with the greats, but, you see, this is a pleasant coincidence.”

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A single woman after 25 years invariably becomes a victim of social stereotypes: “still not married?”, “Has he already proposed to you?” Marriage is regarded as a social package, a positive role, therefore, in a hurry to get rid of the status of being unmarried, women strive to quickly start a serious relationship, without thinking at all about who they really are, whether they are happy in themselves, what they are filled with, because only if a woman is a healing spring , she will be able to give it to someone who suits her heart. Often merging with her husband like Siamese twins, a woman becomes a hostage of this relationship, not imagining life outside his energy field, exhausting herself and exhausting her husband with hysterics, and the whole point is that the spouses initially speak different languages ​​- the limit of his dreams is chips and watch “Comedy Club”, and she talks about some pictures by Bakst, strange French cinema - the man wrinkles his forehead, peering into her face, and thinks: “she seems like a beautiful woman, but duraa!” I in no way want to say that getting married is bad, on the contrary, it’s good, but not because “the time has come,” but because it is with him that you want to rediscover the world, travel, be silent by the fire, laugh until you cry, and most importantly - to dissolve in each other and trust. There is a good phrase: “if you need to explain, then don’t explain.” We often see pictures in which a puppy is friends with a rabbit, a deer with a goose, an elephant with a giraffe, but, unfortunately, they are not destined to be together. You look at two butterflies who found each other in a big dusty city - so they swirled in a dance and then flew away together. A happy couple is like two dolphins swimming synchronously in the ocean at sunset. They support each other, fill each other, live in peace and absolute harmony. In such a union, where people live with the same interests, are friends, do not break each other, but inspire each other to become better, healthy, happy children grow up, and in the union of a goose + a rabbit there will be an endless, exhausting, irreconcilable struggle, forcing people to stall for years at one point, not wanting to accept the fact that initially their union simply was not physiological.

A post shared by Anna Semak (@annas_secret_garden) on Jul 4, 2018 at 3:04pm PDT

The author of Crime and Punishment, by the way, has quite a bit in common with the wife of a football coach. Anna is also a writer. Her book “Intimacy” is coming out soon, and you can pre-order it now. Not only the classics, but also Yuri Dudu will have to fear competition. Semak plans to enter YouTube. Filming of the pilot episode of her project will take place in October in the Himalayas.

It’s not up to us to decide whether Sergei Bogdanovich’s wife is crazy, but there are several strange episodes in her biography.

Two weddings with one husband

In June, the Semakov couple went on vacation to Italy. To avoid boredom on the plane, Sergei proposed to Anna over speakerphone right from the cockpit. The public and media found out about this through Instagram. Moreover, the question of why the crew allowed a stranger to the microphone was not as interesting to the people as the fact that the couple had been engaged for a long time. “Are you getting divorced?” they asked Anna in the comments. The answer was short and clear - “yeah.” However, Sergei Bogdanovich did not confirm this. Be that as it may, the second wedding took place in the autumn in the Italian province of Como.

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I delayed taking my wedding vows until the last minute, which made the organizers quite nervous. My assistant Lisa threatened that if I didn’t gather my courage, then everything would happen as I didn’t like - “ships of love”, “dear newlyweds” and so on according to the traditional registry office scenario. I spent the last two days before the wedding alone - I walked more than twenty kilometers, immersed in deep thoughts, as if until the last I left myself with the thought that my free will does not depend on the dates or on the efforts spent on the celebrations - I might change my mind. Sergei might change his mind. It is important that this decision became conscious and mature for both of us. Taking the first of June 2020 as the starting point for our new relationship, I analyzed everything that happened to us nineteen years earlier - how we, our feelings, attitude towards life, towards each other had changed. I am grateful to fate for this difficult period of my life outside my family, which allowed me to get out of my own body and change points of view, helped me hatch from the egg in which I hid for many years, not wanting to take responsibility, to grow up. During this time, I got rid of fears, stopped listening to advice and depending on other people’s opinions, made friends with my subpersonalities, finding the perfect balance, learned to make decisions on my own, built clear personal boundaries, which qualitatively changed my life and the lives of my loved ones. I am grateful to those who were with me during a difficult period of my life, to those who did not judge me, did not teach me how to act, but simply believed in me, charging me with vital energy. I am grateful to the man who stood on the sidelines and waited patiently, without losing hope that one day we would be together again, but not in order to win another trophy, but because he sincerely wanted to go through our path with a clean slate, taking into account all the mistakes of the past. I couldn’t help but believe him - he’s a man whose words never diverge from his deeds. At this new starting point, I thought a lot about relationships…. Not the most ideal man in the world can make me happy (Continued in the carousel)

A post shared by Anna Semak (@annas_secret_garden) on Oct 8, 2019 at 9:10am PDT

Giving up meat and connecting with space

Anna is a convinced vegan, nature and animal defender. Because of her, Sergei doesn’t eat meat either. The Zenit coach, in his own words, enjoys eating oatmeal with water, avocado, hummus and buckwheat with guacamole, does not drink alcohol and has completely given up sugar. Children are not limited in anything yet. But the players of the St. Petersburg club were less fortunate. Of course, no one takes away the sponsor's pizza in the locker room, but sometimes you have to listen to lectures on healthy eating.

You can’t even swear at Zenit. But this is Semak’s initiative. In general, husband and wife complement each other perfectly. Anna confirms this on Instagram: “I am Serezha’s connection with the cosmos, he is mine – with the earth. Sergei graduated from school with a gold medal, he remained an excellent student throughout his life: rational, wearing trousers with ironed creases, living in a “correct” rectangular matrix. But, looking at me, like a child, with careful, careful steps, he tries out a different life, and he likes it.”

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It so happens that I don't like Thai massage parlors. There is no trust in the Asian immigrants who quietly slide along the narrow corridors towards me with a sly smile. Twilight, the thick suffocating smell of lemongrass, a mournful melody, a hole for your face in the couch... As soon as you stick your head in there, in five minutes you are already suffocating, and there is no turning back - endure it until the end. At this time, it is not clear what is happening behind you - the starched sheets are rustling, oil is pouring, someone is puffing and either kneading with their hands or climbing their back with their bare feet. I want to be loudly indignant: “hey you there! If everything is honest, then turn on the light, stop groaning, don’t rustle your laundry and in general, speak Russian! #massagingIn Thai #Thaispa #whereistheexit

A post shared by Anna Semak (@annas_secret_garden) on Nov 4, 2017 at 4:28pm PDT

Strongly? We bet you will no longer find a single wife of a football player or coach who would formulate her thoughts in this way. Ezequiel Garay's wife Tamara Gorro could compete. But nude photos and fleeing St. Petersburg because of the ghost of a grandmother are not philosophical conclusions under every post. Look through it at your leisure, you definitely won’t remain indifferent. Here it’s time to remember not about Dostoevsky, but about James Joyce. There is such a stream of consciousness, as if you were reading the novel “Ulysses”.

Anna Semak has become so complete in her knowledge that here she seeks only peace, tranquility and harmony from the merging of the infinite with the eternal. We don't judge anyone. Sergei Bogdanovich's wife can only eat spinach, take care of the children of Africa and look for ways to love herself and life. The main thing is that this does not affect Zenit’s results in any way.

Prokhor PANIN

Tanya

Photo: © Personal archive of the Semak family

— How did Sergei react when you told him about your desire to take a child from the orphanage?

“Ten years ago I already tried to adopt a child, but it didn’t work out then. He was taken away before I collected the documents. But I became the godmother of this child. Then we talked with Sergei about adoption for a long time. I understood that it was unlikely that anything would come of it. Because Sergei has a habit of weighing everything and carefully considering such serious actions. Children are adopted by emotional people, not rational ones. I am an emotional person, Sergei is the opposite. He puts everything in order, writes it down and thinks about whether we can cope or not. Conversations like this always ended the same way. He said: “We already have many children, why else?”

One day, a friend brought me to a village near St. Petersburg, to an Orthodox orphanage. The main idea of ​​this shelter is that women take custody of three to five children with disabilities, whom no one is ready to take, and raise them as mothers. This is hard labor. I began to go there, get to know the children and their lifestyle more, and met those women. I was simply shocked and never ceased to be amazed that a person was capable of such heroism. Well, I didn’t give up the idea of ​​accepting another child into the family. But with some special features.

I started thinking about which one. I couldn’t handle a child with cerebral palsy, because I myself have a fragile constitution, and physical strength is needed. It would be hard. It would also be difficult with a child who has mental disorders, because I need feedback.

It was March 8th. I was seriously ill with the flu. I was sitting at home and went to the website of the “Change One Life” charity foundation. There I saw Tanya’s profile. And at that moment I didn’t even pay attention to her features, I just saw her eyes and realized that this was my child. He needs to be picked up urgently.

— Who was the first to be informed about Tanya?

— I have a close friend Natasha Ignashevich (wife of Sergei Ignashevich. — Match TV)

). I sent her a link to this questionnaire and wrote: “Natasha, all my life I was afraid that I would have an unhealthy child. But I saw Tanya and felt that I wanted to become her mother. Do you believe in me? She answers: I believe. From then on everything started to take off.

For a long time I didn’t know how to tell Sergei about this. He was somewhere at an away game, and I just sent him this questionnaire. He wrote back: “This is a good girl. God grant her to find good parents.” But I didn't give up. I talked to him again and again, arguing that I could handle it, that I would change if necessary. I felt that it was not she who needed it, but us. When you live in comfortable conditions, where everything is beautiful, where you don’t see pain and difficulties around you, your soul does not develop.

And at some point he gave up. We agreed that I would take her to visit. My bet was high - I understood that this was not a game at all. If I come to a child and say: “I’ll take you,” it means that I’m taking him forever. I couldn’t tell her: “You came to us and stayed, but, you know, I thought and realized that it would be difficult for me.” The last thing I wanted was to break Tanya’s heart.

When I arrived, the first thing I said was that I would pick her up. It was a very difficult moment. Sergei thought that she came to stay with us. And Tanya knew that I would take her. This required a settlement. Sergei is a man of the broadest soul, the kindest of everyone I have ever met, and I understood that when he took her in his arms, he would not be able to return her. And so it happened. Already on the second day it became clear that Tanya would not leave us anywhere.

Anna Semak: “Some Zenit fans started cursing me”

Home / Society

8.12.2019

The wife of the ex-captain of Rubin presented a book in Kazan, spoke about the adoption of a black child and stated that her “husband is the best nanny”

Writer, blogger, influencer, wife of the head coach of Zenit and part-time mother of 7 children and 5 dogs Anna Semak held a creative meeting at the Kazan clothing store F-people concept store, where she presented her book “Closeness”. She told her fans why the whole family was going to Africa, why she didn’t go to school meetings and didn’t sell her house in Kazan.

The director of the fashion store F-people concept store, Irina Kharasova, celebrated her birthday in a non-trivial way - on the eve of the holiday, her longtime friend Anna Semak visited the store Photo: Amir Safin

“I HAD A SPECIAL PRIVILEGE—NO EDITOR COULD EDIT ME”

The director of the fashion store F-people concept store, Irina Kharasova, once again celebrated her birthday in a non-trivial way this week - if last year she arranged a meeting in the boutique with the famous etiquette teacher Tatyana Polyakova , then this time on the eve of the holiday the store visited her longtime friend Anna Semak . Apparently, they became close when her husband Sergei Semak captained Rubin Kazan. As a result, Kharasova turned out to be one of the few guests at the high-profile re-wedding of the football-blogger couple, posing with Svetlana Bondarchuk and celebrity makeup artist Serdar Kambarov in the interiors of a villa on Lake Como.

Semak presented her book “Closerness” - 100 copies brought to Kazan were instantly sold out, with some guests taking two or four copies at once on the eve of the New Year holidays. The autobiographical publication about “significant meetings and events” from the life of the writer, in the spirit of her elder comrades Tolstoy and Gorky, is divided into three parts: “Childhood”, “Youth” and “Maturity”. At the presentation, she complained that she did not have a moderator, and this role was taken on by another friend of the blogger, head of the creative agency Evolution Arina Sudakova , who asked when she started writing.

“When I was 6 years old, I wrote a poem,” said Semak and immediately quoted it. - “A brave border guard was driving from the sea, and a dog was in front of him. Let the thunderclap get to the guy, let the thirst of the young get to him, he won’t complain to people that life is not easy.” It is kept by my parents. I wrote my first book at the age of 8, it was called “He and She.” Later, Marc Levy stole the title from me.” By the way, Anna’s popular Instagram annas_secret_garden (517 thousand subscribers) was named after the garden in which the book was born. “In our private house we had our own secret garden, where I ran away in the morning and from where I returned late in the evening. I have always said that I did not go to kindergarten, but grew up in my secret garden, where my first dreams of becoming a writer were born. And there I wrote my first book,” she shared.

Later, the girl entered the philology department (apparently at Tver State University) thanks to her victory in the city essay competition, and after graduating she wrote articles for the men's magazine XXL. “I wrote there under a pseudonym for two years. The writer Marina Stepnova was my first editor, and she guided me very gently and correctly. Later I had a special privilege - no editor could edit me. Always, when I came to work somewhere, I had a condition: not a single word should be corrected,” Semak emphasized. Following her rule, BUSINESS Online also did not change anything in the writer’s direct speech.

Semak presented her book “Closeness” - an autobiographical publication about “significant meetings and events” from the life of the writer Photo: Amir Safin

“I HONESTLY TELL EVERYONE: I AM NOT IN A RESOURCE, I NEED TO LEAVE URGENTLY”

Next, Anna told an interesting detail - while living in Kazan, she wrote for 8 years for the magazine “Courage”. “I had my own column, and I had a place to diverge, because on Instagram you can write no more than 2 thousand characters, but there I have 5 thousand. The column was published once a month, people were waiting for it. My article was always accompanied by a cool illustration by my friend Eli Gordeeva - we had such joint creativity,” noted Semak. Then she wrote for Internet portals. She got Instagram after a trip to New York, where she met TV presenter Irena Ponaroshku .

“I walk into the lobby of the Metropolitan Opera, I have a shock of honey-colored hair fluttering and a red velvet skirt that matches the color of the flooring, I’m wearing high heels... And I kept imagining how I would finally realize my dream and how spectacularly, with a glass of champagne, I would parade in lounge, watching Puccini’s opera “La Bohème.” And the day before, Irena and I and our vegan brothers visited a dubious restaurant and tried a lot of things that shouldn’t have been mixed. And then, at the entrance to the Metropolitan Opera, I felt strange urges. Plus the horns in Times Square are incessant, the smells of food, from the sewer... In general, there was a collapse at the Metropolitan Opera. And after that I wrote a story and sent it to Irena. She says: “Why don’t you have Instagram?” I answer: “Listen, for my husband the words “death” and “Instagram” mean the same thing.” Irena said: “I promise that you will start Instagram and you will have 100 thousand subscribers in a year,” said Semak. Thus, personal embarrassment in the world opera hall became the reason for the appearance of her blog. For a long time, Anna was afraid to admit to creating an account to her husband, a rather non-public person. Stories and photographs were banned for him until 2020, and only recently did he relax and shoot content for the social network himself.

The writer shared that before Instagram, she physically devoted herself to children for 10 years - she was pregnant for 5 years and breastfeeding for 5 years. “All sorts of haters often write to me: “What kind of mother, she travels constantly, you can’t do that!” I just came up with the ideal formula for myself - I feel when I’m at zero and I’m no longer a mother, not a wife, not a friend, but an angry animal in a cage, and , when I understand that my presence in the house is no longer effective, I honestly inform everyone: I am not a resource, I need to leave urgently. I tried it for a day at first - good, great, but not enough. Then I realized that it’s better to fully charge the batteries, and I come back full and can give my children much more than if I’m in the state of an animal in a cage,” says the blogger and adds that lately he often comes to Kazan: they own their country house they were never sold at the request of their daughter Varvara , who was born in the capital of Tatarstan.

“THE BEST SCHOOL FOR MY SON IS SURFING!”

Anna also shared the secrets of her raising children. Her having many children was partly influenced by the words of a priest, a friend of her father. In his youth, he forced the girl to “forcibly confess” and said that she would “be saved by bearing children.” “I remembered this when I already had five children. I had a shock - a fateful phrase that determined my whole life,” said Semak. According to her, when she leaves, the father remains with the children, replacing five mothers. “We don’t even have a nanny who comes every day. My friends often bring their children to us because my husband is the best nanny. I have never met a better father in my life. When I leave, the children become closer to him. He takes everyone with him to the football base, the children play sports there, make friends with football players, and gain experience of adult life,” said the writer. The housekeeping issues in their house are handled by a Filipina who has been living with them for 6 years.

Speaking about teaching children, the blogger admitted that she considers surfing to be the best school for her son. “The whole school despises me. My kids go private and I have a few rules - I never participate in parent chats (I think many moms will understand). At one time I had 7 of them! And in the morning these pictures of cats, good morning... And it all comes down to the fact that a child can put a note in his diary with information that he needs to bring 500 rubles. And this eternal spam, a waste of your own and other people’s time... I don’t think it’s necessary to clog up your phone with millions of messages. I don't go to meetings because I don't have enough hours in the day to do my own thing. My children changed about 20 schools due to constant moving. And out of all the institutions, only twice did I attend a meeting where the information was presented in a abstract manner, the teacher was prepared in advance. Because the meeting is some kind of benefit performance for the teacher, a stream of consciousness. And it may not always resonate with ours. At some point I decided that I couldn’t waste time, sit for four hours and listen to something that could fit into short, important information,” she said and emphasized that she was outside of this system, which represents “stupid adherence to rules invented by other people."

Anna does not punish her children, because “punishment” comes from the word “execution.” “The traditional scheme of ‘I’ll deprive you of your iPhone’ is terribly destructive, in fact, it’s called manipulation,” she said. Moreover, Semak limited access for children to the popular social networks TikTok and Like, because men started writing to her 10-year-old daughter there. “The network is such a bait for pedophiles. I explained to the children that they cannot post everything on social networks. Still, you need to be careful,” the writer emphasized.

She did not send her children to kindergarten, because “the system averages the child’s talents.” Instead of early development, the blogger suggests paying attention to the behavior of parents. “I believe that you need to behave decently. It’s trite - don’t swear in front of a child, he understands everything. Don't quarrel with his father. The child is absolutely aware of everything and takes it personally,” notes Anna. In her opinion, if parents know how to achieve their goals, they are polite and kind, sincere and unhypocritical, then their children will be absolutely the same. “I read from one of the holy fathers that twin girls were enslaved. As a result, one of them ended up with a nun, and the second with a prostitute. A nun raised a nun, and a prostitute raised a prostitute. Decent people have decent children. If alcoholics grow up to have good children, then this is usually some kind of divine providence,” she believes.

According to Anna, when she leaves, her father, Sergei Semak, remains with the children, who replaces five mothers Photo: BUSINESS Online

“I KNEW FROM CHILDHOOD THAT I WOULD HAVE A BLACK-SKINED BABY”

One of the blogger’s fans asked her question, very nervous and embarrassed. Indeed, there is something hypnotic in Semak’s image and behavior - perhaps this explains the army of her fans, so many of whom gathered in the small room of the Kazan store that some had to watch what was happening from the stairs and floors above (however, their stay there was brightened up by snacks and champagne). The question concerned the trip (which also worried Zenit fans) of the Semak family to Africa. As it turned out, Anna was inspired to go there after the film “The Salt of the Earth” by Brazilian photographer Sebastian Salgado , where he showed the real life of the inhabitants of the continent.

“We will go with my husband, my friend Maria Lotte and the director (of the film that Semak will create - editor's note ). I always knew that I would end up in Africa - I have a very subtle intuition, I foresee some events in my life. Moreover, I always knew from childhood that I would have a dark-skinned baby. I immediately warned my husband as soon as we started dating: “You know, I will have a dark-skinned child.” He, of course, was shocked: “What do you mean?!” I say: “With you or not, I just know that this is my destiny.” I feel". Just as I knew that there would be an adopted child - I had no doubts about this since childhood,” shared Semak.

She began her search for a dark-skinned child through a friend who is married to a Nigerian. “I jokingly ask her: “Natasha, does anyone in the Nigerian community accidentally give up their child?” Otherwise, I feel like it’s my destiny, but for some reason the child doesn’t come to me,” said the writer. A friend pointed her to the creator of the Vanity boutique, Mila Anufrieva , who is now helping children in Africa. “I cried all night reading her stories,” the blogger admits. “The next day I called Mila. Naturally, it turned out that this was my man. She told me fantastic stories, and I realized that it was no coincidence that everything turned out this way.”

“For me, as a person of the world, there are no geographical boundaries. I believe that if we all live on the same planet, then we are all brothers. I can’t wrap my head around what kind of division this is.” Photo: Amir Safin

According to the wife of the Zenit coach, her husband somehow easily agreed to the trip, but there was a terrible commotion in the club. “When I wrote the post, it immediately reached the management: “Sergei Bogdanovich, weigh the risks.” Some Zenit fans started cursing me, writing: “Go anywhere, but leave our coach alone.” Not without temptations in good deeds, so I believe that this trip will change our lives,” says Anna. She also mentioned reproaches that she is helping not the residents of Russia, but the inhabitants of another continent. “I always explain here that, firstly, we help, and secondly, for me, as a person of the world, there are no geographical boundaries or conventions. I believe that if we all live on the same planet, then we are all brothers. I can’t wrap my head around what kind of division this is. If in India I see a dying cat on the road, will I really say: “We have so many cats in Russia, this is her karma, let her die here,” the writer noted. It’s interesting that the first black player at Zenit, Colombian defensive midfielder Vilmar Barrios , appeared just under Semak. Previously, the club followed a strange tradition of not signing such players.

The blogger also spoke about her future series of children’s books “in the spirit of Exupery’s The Little Prince,” exposing deep social problems, and advised reading Tanya Tank’s “Fear, I’m with you” about narcissism. “Now every second person is a narcissist, every first one is a little bit of an abuser,” the writer noted. She also talked about love in the spirit of many psychological sites and books: “People fall in love with what they have a strong hunger for. If a person has not received tactility from her parents, for example a girl from her father, then she will look for a warm, tactile man. Further development of the scenario depends on the spirituality of both partners. I am an Orthodox person, but in Buddhism there is such an interesting observation: if you meet a person and your knees are shaking, this is not love. Healthy relationships are about acceptance and partnership. “Dad” and “daughter”, “mother” and “son” - pure neuroticism.” After such words, I felt a little whiff of Mikhail Labkovsky , although Semak herself does not really like the popular psychologist.

The meeting ended with an autograph session and selfies with readers. All the snacks were eaten, the champagne was drunk, and the books were sorted. One of Kharasova’s friends, saying goodbye to her, oh

Valeria Zavyalova

Video: Amir Safin

Photo at the announcement: Amir Safin

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Leader

Photo: © Personal archive of the Semak family

— How did you prepare your children for such an event? And how did they react to Tanya’s appearance in the house?

“I’ve been preparing them for quite a long time.” I read them fairy tales and stories that had themes on the theme of orphanhood. We talked a lot. I showed them documentaries and feature films; by the way, I advise everyone to watch the film “Bluff, or Happy New Year.” And after that they realized what it means to live without parents. She explained to them: “Imagine that you are walking with your mother through the station. Suddenly your mother's hand is lost, and you are left alone. What will you feel? Horror and panic. The child from the orphanage feels the same. Then you will meet your mother and calm down. And they live like this all the time.”

They were ready mentally. I told them that Tanya wasn’t walking. Everyone was very sympathetic to this and tried to help her in everything. To be honest, I didn’t expect this from my children. They showed the greatest mercy and were ready to give her their toys. But then one period passed and another came. Adaptation period for the whole family. It was a difficult time. Each of the guys at least once told her: “It was better when you weren’t there.” Tanya also has a complex character. She is a leader by nature, and in our family everyone is a leader. There were moments when it became extremely difficult for me.

— How did you manage to overcome this?

— When a person integrates into a new system, he tries to find the boundaries of the possible in order to understand how to exist in the new world. Tanya lived at the orphanage according to a schedule; they had a teacher. That is, children there do not belong to themselves. And here you have complete freedom, but you don’t know how to use it.

When Tanya and I first arrived home, she honestly said: “Mom, I steal.” - "How interesting. What are you stealing?” - “I steal, for example, mobile phones.”

At first, in the evenings, I moved the mattress aside, and everything there was stuffed, like a magpie, with various things, everything that lay badly. We talked a lot with her. I told Tanya: “You have everything you can dream of. You don't have to hide anything." It was very important to find a mechanism, to choose a key that would suit her.

There is one very subtle point with adopted children. Until the child is sure that he will be in the new family forever, he will not show his best side. This phase in psychology is called: “Love me black, and everyone will love me white.” In this way, the child checks his parents. At some point I was already on the edge, I felt: something was going wrong, almost nothing was working out, although I was trying. When I found myself in a completely exhausted emotional state, suddenly something switched and the child instantly became one of his own.

— How long did the adaptation period last?

— It was very difficult for a year and a half.

Happiness

Photo: © Personal archive of the Semak family

— How did Sergei react to this? Did he give in to the same thoughts you had?

— Sergei supported me in every possible way. I went to foster parents’ school, but he couldn’t because of his work commitments. But I read the lectures I printed out. He gave me many examples of them: “You remember, there are cases where everything is much worse. And our Tanya is just an angel.” Mostly Tanya had conflicts with her children. Very rarely with me, because Sergei and I were an example for her, her dream of ideal parents. And this saved us. From the very beginning and until now, the worst thing for her is to offend her mother and upset her father.

— In our country, let’s speak frankly, they don’t take children from the orphanage too often. In addition, children with disabilities.

- Everything comes from the head. Sometimes we live by imposed stereotypes. There is still an opinion that people with disabilities are outcasts living in confined spaces. And carrying a child in a stroller is shameful, it means that something is wrong with you. In our family there are no such thoughts, stereotypes and concepts.

I felt very comfortable from the very beginning. I didn’t notice that anything was wrong with Tanya. At first she told me: “Mom, at school they say that I am disabled.” - “What are you doing? What kind of disabled person are you?! Of course you are not disabled. You have a very beautiful face. Lovely hair. This is the color every woman dreams of wearing.” It's great when parents convince their children that everything is fine with them. Because that's how it is. It is already our narrow-mindedness to consider a person with limited abilities as a disabled person. Opportunities and abilities are two different things. Over time, the boundaries become blurred. Now I don't notice that there's anything wrong with her. From time to time I catch surprised looks from strangers, but I’ve already gotten used to it.

- Can you admit to yourself: “Despite the difficulties and problems, I don’t regret taking her”?

“I watch how Tanya is changing. How happy she is, how she plays on the floor with the dogs, how she learns to cook. I see her success at school. And I get scared just by the thought that we might never meet. Tanya is an absolutely confident, happy person. I would like her to have a profession in the future, and to go beyond the stereotypical boundaries of a person with limited abilities.

Adoption through the eyes of a father: football player Sergei Semak and his seven children

Footballer and coach, five-time Russian champion Sergei Semak answered questions from the portal “Takiye Dela” as a father of six children, who recently welcomed another child into the family - a girl with a disability.

Photo: Valery Zaitsev/SCHSCHI for TD

— When we talked with your wife Anna almost six months ago, she said that at first you were against Tanya’s adoption.

- I was never against it. But considering that we already have a lot of children, constant moving and other concerns, it was important for me to do everything in a timely manner. So that we understand and calculate our strengths. After all, a large family means a lot of work and responsibility for children. They are all different, each has their own problems.

As for the idea itself, I always supported Anya in this. We just didn’t have the same timing as to when it would be best to do it. In my opinion, if we have the opportunity to help, naturally we should help.

I perfectly understand my temporary capabilities and Anya’s, because we have been together for quite a long time and can understand who has what resources. Again, everything that is done is done for the better. We can assume, but God disposes.

— Was there a specific moment when you realized that you were ready to welcome a new child into the family?

— Initially, we considered this option: take it for a couple of months and see what the child is like. So let’s say, in “home mode”. But when Tanya came home for the first time, the understanding was absolute and one hundred percent - this is our new family member. And no one talked about guest mode. I realized this the moment I saw the girl at the door.

— Were you afraid before meeting Tanya?

- Probably not. I have seen so many children in my life that it is difficult to surprise me with anything.

I had to understand how we could medically help Tanya and how to care for her. And if Anya had a certain euphoria that a lot could be done, then I, as a man, had a more restrained position. We are somehow moving in this direction. The most important question for me - regardless of whether we can help Tanya medically or not - is to give the girl a family. And everything else is secondary.

There have been many difficulties and there will be more. You know, with people and children I immediately get this emotional feeling: you understand whether a person is yours or not. When I saw Tanya, I realized that she was a person close to me in spirit.

Unfortunately, we rarely see people with problems in our country. Because there are no ramps, elevators, etc.

And all the pranks committed by children are all understandable. Anya studied at a foster parent's school, and we were prepared for various difficulties with the child. But I haven't seen anything so terrible. I have confidence in Tanya. Her kindness, compassion, empathy - they are never in doubt. Of course, you can’t guess what will happen when adolescence comes. But now we can give the kindness of relationships. And hope in God that he will help both us and Tanya cope with difficulties. To reach those spiritual heights when Tanya would live an ordinary full life.

Anna and Sergey Semak and their daughter Tanya Photo: Valery Zaitsev/SCHSCHI for TD

After all, there is only one problem - movement. And not only for her, but for many children and adults. Often, for them, such a limit rests not only on movement, but also on their entire life. Therefore, if I had not met Tanya, I would not have felt the complexity of people like her. Unfortunately, we rarely see people with problems in our country. Because there are no ramps, elevators, etc. Therefore, in everyday life we ​​will not meet a person in a wheelchair, for example, in a cafe. Although this should be absolutely normal.

— Surely this was the most difficult moment for you in your relationship with Tanya.

- Not really! I try never to feel sorry for her. Naturally, Tanya wants to be small. But I want her to understand that she is already an adult, a 10-year-old child. Tanya must and will live according to the requirements of our family that exist. She is obliged to study well - just like other children. Responsible for cleaning up after themselves, doing other things, looking after and protecting their brothers and sisters. As the others. Naturally, she asks for help in some things that she cannot do herself. But in other respects, she is the same as all other children.

We may have spoiled Tanya a little in terms of self-care. But Anya and I see our task as ensuring that Tanya can feel completely independent. In the future we want to create even more comfortable living conditions.

To be offended that I don’t have something, but you do, is probably not entirely right

In general, all that is required of us, parents, is to provide a good education, a job and an independent life. No one is going to tie Tanya to themselves. We are trying to understand what Tanya’s goal is, what she does best. I can’t say specifically yet, but I feel a great desire for learning in her. She has wonderful handwriting and draws wonderfully. Well, the computer opens up much more possibilities for her. In the future, Tanya will be able to drive, work and move around on her own. We see our mission as giving her spiritual education and the opportunity to realize herself in life.

— As I understand, you don’t exactly have military attitudes in your family, but the rules are quite serious.

— Naturally, we have a certain order. We are believers, we go to church once a week to receive communion. And of course, we try to be an example for children. And so for them the requirements are the same. Evening prayer, going to church - I hope this helps all our children. And it helps us, adults, to work on ourselves.

Photo: Valery Zaitsev/SCHSCHI for TD

— Did you believe in God at a conscious age or as a child?

“I always had before me the example of my grandmother, who in those days - and then it was not so easy to even find a temple - prayed on church holidays. Therefore, the understanding that God exists has always been there. Of course, I became a church a little later, when the realization came, and many, many other things grew together.

When a person with disabilities or a child who is terminally ill, for example, appears in life, this is a gift from God.

Everything that is given to us is for something. Either it will be better for the person, or you will be able to change the lives of hundreds of people around you. To be offended that I don’t have something, but you do, is probably not entirely correct. Although I understand this logic. Here children are born unhappy, in poor conditions, sick. Why do they need this? This is a very deep question. I have my own understanding of this, but I cannot explain it. This will seem like an imposition of my thoughts, which may cause discussion later. I don't want. I believe that everything that is given is given by God in order to do something. Although my friends have different opinions on this matter.

— By the way, did your friends or colleagues have any misunderstanding about why you took Tanya to you?

— There were no discussions. It seems to me that most people have a good heart. But due to certain events, some people’s hearts become harder. But everyone understands that if you do good, then the question “why” does not arise.

— How does your employment affect your family and children? You fly back and forth all the time, training, business. You can’t just communicate with children on Skype.

— Of course, you always want to pay more attention. But I understand that now I have to work. The family is large and there is a breadwinner. I have to take care of the whole family and do everything to make them feel comfortable. Unfortunately, the financial side now outweighs, but I think that this is also my area of ​​responsibility. I don't work hard to enjoy myself. I work to provide for my family, to help them and other people. The fact that my favorite job allows me to provide for my family—I need to thank God for that, of course.

Daughters of the Semak family: Ilaria and Tanya Photo: Valery Zaitsev/SCHSCHI for TD

— What needs to happen for you to devote more time to your family?

— The results of my work. Now I'm an assistant coach. Then there will be coaching work. A bad result, a lack of funding in the club - you can be left without work or move to another club.

— What would you like to do in five to ten years?

— A lot of things are interesting. I would like to have my own farm and do gardening. Vineyards somewhere in Crimea, along with a garden of apples and cherries... I would like to collect many varieties of sakura and cherries that grow in our latitudes. In the future, when the children are a little older and there is no need to work every day, I hope this will happen.

- Let's talk a little more about Tanya. Let's be honest: she was luckier than the rest of the kids who live in orphanages or boarding schools for the disabled. What is wrong or wrong with this system in our country?

- In my understanding, this is a machine that does not stop for a second. They are looked after, cared for, and given some funds. But there is no spiritual education. Apart from the family, who will give it? Yes, maybe someone will be lucky enough to meet a teacher who will sow the seeds of goodness that will grow in the future. Such a child will have a normal life and family. But for many this will not be the case. They don't see normal family models. Such guys grow up, they have children, whom they also leave. And it's a wheel that never stops. When the number of orphanages begins to decrease, then everything will be possible.

Children are born unhappy, in poor conditions, sick. Why do they need this? this is a very deep question

Everything depends on the spiritual component of our society. From our attitude towards children with disabilities, towards the elderly... So far, our society, unfortunately, is not healthy.

Children are not interested in any goal; the only thing that is important is the process itself. The only motivation for a child is the process, and the environment in which he develops.

— I’ll ask you three simple questions. First: what does family mean to you?

- It seems to me that the family... So we go to church every Sunday, to the Creator, to our Father. And the family is just a model of the structure of the world, but outside the church. In my understanding, family is the only possible and correct form of physical and spiritual education of children. The most important thing in life is family.

— Second question: what is your biggest fear in life?

- Of course, we have to endure everything. But still, I really wouldn’t want to outlive my children.

— And lastly: what does love mean to you?

“Perhaps this is happiness given to us from above.” It includes a huge number of hidden words, but it can be expressed in one word. This is happiness. A rare moment when you are happy, and when you love, it is impossible to do otherwise.

— Do you often feel happy?

- Yes.

***

Tanya was lucky - she found herself in a loving family who, having extensive experience, can raise a child with a disability on their own. But many parents who have adopted children with special needs into their families cannot cope on their own. The employees of the Resource Center of the Here and Now charity foundation know how to help: children cope with their impulses or outbursts of aggression, and parents gain the necessary knowledge and confidence in their abilities.

The “Help is Needed” Foundation collects funds for the work of the Resource Center employees - salaries of teachers, psychologists, art therapists, thanks to which many children will be able to stay in the family rather than return to the institution. Your help is very important. Please make a monthly donation of any amount now. Thank you.